When struggling with low confidence and Nervousness: Focus on Service

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Here is a quick tip for when you are feeling nervous about doing something or putting yourself ‘out there’ in a way that feels vulnerable: focus on service. Most of the time, when we are nervous, we are thinking about ourselves: will it go well, will they like me, will I do it right, etc. We are focused on judgment (ours and other people’s), protecting ourselves, visibility, and what our hopes are for the outcome. The thing with nervousness is – the more we get in our head about it, the worse it becomes. We get stuck in a loop of worry and self-consciousness, which affects our mindset and our confidence. Something we may have been passionate or excited about in the first place now feels like something we dread or fear. The good news is that you can interrupt that mental and emotional loop.

What You'll Need

  • None needed

What You'll Do

  • The first step is to connect in to why you wanted to do this thing in the first place. Ask yourself: Why is it important to you? Why is it interesting, meaningful, or exciting to you? What does it connect you with that helps move you closer to your dream or desire? The second step is to take the focus off of yourself completely, and focus on the other people that are involved. Who are you doing this for? Why does this matter? How does this help others? What do you hope for the other person or people that will receive or experience your offering, your words, your action, etc.? What greater sense of purpose are you serving?
  • When we focus on others and how we may serve them, it’s a very different experience than focusing on our own insecurities. So, put your attention on the ‘who’ and the ‘why’ and really lean in to being of service. Your passion will translate to others and you will be more open and genuine in your delivery.
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